What makes you think you'd top?
by Cinnamylchlorid
Summary: One thing was for sure - Rin Tohsakas studies in Clock Tower and her life in London surely didn't proceed as well as she expected. But, as Shirou Emiya, her boyfriend, pointed out already, this shouldn't really impress her after the Holy Grail War. Nevertheless, she wasn't prepared for an exam anxiety. But there was something else she couldn't handle quite well...


This fanfiction is based on the following three prompts, published on OTPprompts on Tumblr:

 _Person A gets annoyed with Person B, and says "Fuck you." Person B's response is "What makes you think you'd top?"_

 _Imagine person A is usually more submissive during sex, but one day they are feeling aggressive and physically fight person B for dominance. It gets pretty intense, with biting. Does B enjoy it? Who wins the fight?_

 _Imagine your OTP getting into a heated argument. Person A looks at Person B with fire in their eyes and says "shut up". Person B replies with "make me". Sexual tension and possible anger sex ensues._

That being said, I published this story on my Tumblr as well - with MA-content. So if you're over 18 and comfortable with such content, check out my Tumblr-page!  
Thanks for reading! :)

* * *

The sun was already setting. Rin was staring out of their apatement, through the big windows with the chestnut wooden frames. The sky was painted in beautiful red and orange colours which faded slowly into the vivid blue.

She sighed. This week wasn't going easy on her. One thing was for sure - her studies in Clock Tower and her life in London surely didn't proceed as well as she expected.

Rin Tohsaka approached the end of the semester. And with that, she had her first upcoming scary exam. Which was an oral exam. And she hated oral exams.

And moreover, Tohsaka didn't want to admit it - because she was the best graduate of her high school in 10 years!, that for the first time in her life she was nervous because of her educational career. Because of this stupid, dumbass oral exam.

But, as Shirou, her boyfriend, pointed out already, this shouldn't really impress her. After the Holy Grail War, after the time of her live where she was _so_ close to death more than once, an exam shouldn't bug her. But still, it did. About the War, her father tought her everything. How to cope with everything. The tiniest bit. Although she was just seventeen, she was more than well prepared for the things to come.

On the other hand, she wasn't prepared for an exam anxiety. She didn't know that something like that could exist within her. And now, it was there. She wished she knew how to deal with that.

But there was something else she couldn't handle quite well. And that certain something was bugging her mind for the past week - in addition to her exam - her jealousy.

" _Damn brat._ ", she whispered to herself, as Shirou wasn't home yet. Luvia would, one day, die a horrible death, if she continued to flirt with Shirou. Her voice appeared in the black haired girl's head, and a shiver of disgust was going down her spine. She always couldn't stand her, even despite of the fact that she was obviously trying to seduce her boyfriend.

Her companion. Her servant. Shirou was _hers_. Hers alone. She felt her jealousy eating her away, because she knew that Shirou was out for his last voluntary class now. Because she felt a fear so clear that some day, Luvia might take him away from her. Because the stupid auburn haired man did not make clear that he and Rin were in a _very serious_ relationship. Not clear enough, to be exact, for Rins thoughts. He would always decline Luvias invitations with a smile. With a polite excuse that didn't mention his girlfriend. And she wished it did.

She frowned and sighed, and her head met the books she was reading. It was already dark outside, and tomorrow would be her last exam of the semester. Finally. After that she would get a two-week-break. With peace and silence.

If it weren't for a certain man she was living with. And the emotions he was stirring up in her.

Shirou, in contrast, already had all his exams for this semester as he was only doing the introductory courses. Still, he would help her out and test her on her knowledge. Like he usually did. Screw his free time, screw his wishes to help her out. And he didn't have much free time, because he took quite a lot one week-voluntary courses to build up his knowledge furthermore. For her, she knew. He wanted to be as strong as he possibly could for her. He wanted to be able to save her, whatever came up. And she knew, that was the only reason why he was taking extra courses.

No, he wasn't much in because in the last days. But still, she didn't feel like she wanted to see him or even have any of his help right now. She didn't feel like seeing him at all, because... well, although both of them have been in a relationship for more than a year, she still felt anxious when she felt certain emotions around him. Being nervous was one of them. Being extremely jealous was another.

Living alone for a few years had left its trails on her. Shirou had shown her how awful she felt in all that time. When she had been alone for all that time, she didn't really feel the loneliness she was embraced by. But his company in the Holy Grail War was the best thing that happened to her, she had to admit. She loved him for being with her, no matter the danger, no matter the consequence. She loved him for saving her, for trusting her blindly.

The thought of losing him scared her, she thought to herself. But that was something she wouldn't say out loud. Not as a Tohsaka. And this was exactly why she was so afraid of Luvia. She didn't have the fear to speak out what she felt. What if Shirou fell for that stupid girl because of that! What if...

Their apartement door opened. "See you at the weekend, Sherou!", she heard Luvia say. Ugh, to speak of the devil. That bitch, of course she was clinging on him when she wasn't near. What plan did she have now? "We'll see, Luvia-san.", he nervously laughed, waving to her and closing the door after him, a sigh escaping his lips. Shirou's eyes met Rins.

"Tohsaka.", he smiled, walking up to her, patting her head. He would never get over his habit, he would always call her Tohsaka in everyday life-situations. Usually, she liked his voices' sound - soft, sweet, calming. Usually she loved the cute face he was pulling when he was finally seeing her again, after a long day. But that wasn't calming her down anymore, with this kind of nervousity because of the exam, and additionally, with that strange remark Luvia made.

"How are you doing?", he asked, taking the only empty seat across from her. He put his books on the table.

She didn't answer. Like she usually did in the last week - because all of his voluntary classes were with Luvia. She signed herself in, Rin knew that. She saw in the class list herself. And she knew, from Shirou as well, that both of them were getting along quite well. She felt herself getting pissed.

Shirous sigh was putting her back into reality. "You'll do great tomorrow. You're the best magus I've ever seen, and all the professors and teachers have been impressed by you so far."

She just sighed. Answering him in her current state was a pain as well. And it has been for the past week. And, of course, she let him feel that. "That's because you've only seen so little, idiot."

Silently, he moved his books from the table to the windowsill behind him, still smiling, but with a certain pain in his eyes. A certain pain she has seen for the last days. He stood up and went behind her chair.

His big, warm, loving hands met her stiff shoulders.

"Shall I give you a massage?", he understandingly asked, in his usual Emiya-manner. Always good, always patient, always caring for her. And she loved him for knowing what she needed.

Usually, she craved massages. Because he grew increasingly strong in those years. And incredibly skilled with those beautiful hands that were easing her shoulders. And things that, sometimes, came after those massages. When he shyly stated that her crimson red blouse was in the way, unbuttoning it carefully. Kissing her mouth and her cheeks with such a passion and love. When he kneaded her shoulders, making her relax, afterwards removing her bra ("The straps. They're in the way. I-I can't give you a proper massage with that on.") and, after going on with her back and her shoulders, he slowly embraced her breasts at first, moving those warm, lovely hands somewhere else...

As she felt his hands on her shoulders, and she remembered that he was sharing a class with _her_ , she returned to her upright position, raising her hands to remove his slender fingers from her body. It was way too long that they did these things. That they exchanged a loving kiss. But right now, she couldn't do it, although she was craving his body, craving his warmth. Craving especially his love. But now, she had other things on her mind.

She had to focus on this bloody exam, or else, her mind would kill her.

"Sorry, Emiya-kun, but I don't feel like it." she coldly stated, focusing herself back onto her book as her consciousness was nagging at her not revising everything again.

Shirou responded the way he usually did in the last days. He elicited an almost unhearable sigh and she felt his frustration growing bigger. It was very unusual for him not to respond to her, so he just went back, fell loudly into his chair and grabbed a book and started reading.

"Shirou.", she spoke up after a few minutes of silence.

"Hmm?"

"How was your class?", she stated in a normal fashion.

"Oh, I enjoyed it, actually.", he looked up from his book, his adorable lips curving into a smile, obviously enjoying that fact that his girlfriend finally cared, finally tried to ease the strange feeling between them. "We did Mana studies today. That was quite helpful, actually."

Rin sighed. She didn't get the information she wanted to. "What did you do exactly?"

Shirous smile was fading. "Oh, actually, we only did some reading assignments with a partner."

"Who did you pick?"

"Well, Luvia's the only one in class I know, so...", he was rubbing his head in defense.

So _that's how it was_.

"Okay.", she responded. "And what's on with her at the weekend?"

"I assumed you would be bringing that up at some point.", Shirou sighed. "She invited me to one of her dinner parties."

"And?"

"Of course I declined."

"Did you finally bring up that we're in a serious relationship?"

Shirou looked down. "Of course I did. But Luvia didn't leave it with that."

"I see.", Rin answered. Her hand which was under the table formed into a fist. " _I see..._ "

Half an hour went on with no conversation and, in the meantime, Rin got very upset because she felt like she didn't remember anything of her summary she now had in front of her. Because her thoughts were revolving around that stupid bitch. And she was so angry, as Luvia wouldn't leave Shirou alone although she knew that they were a couple. And, in addition, all of this hadn't happened in the first place if Shirou wouldn't be so polite. If he turned Luvia down for once, in a way that wasn't polite, that was showing his feelings for her for real, Luvia might get it. It wasn't only Luvia that played into this thing. Shirou did as well.

She was going crazy now. She felt her blood boil in her veins.

And she knew herself well enough to think that an upset-feeling Tohsaka was no good.

"Rin, I know you don't want to hear this now, but you're prepared very well. You should stop learning and get some rest.", she heard him say. His hand was meeting hers. She was shaking her head, because now, she didn't want Shirou to know anything was wrong. Apart from the exam, of course.

"Do you want to eat anything?", Shirou asked. Tohsaka shook her head.

"Any particular drink you crave?", she was shaking her head again. Anger overflew her out of nothing.

"Can I do anything good for you?", he asked with a insightful face, when she snapped.

"Yes, you can, Emiya-kun", she started, staring at him, clenching her fists, removing his hand from hers. "You can leave me alone until tomorrow and stop making suggestions to help me. I'd be feeling a lot better if you weren't here."

Shirou slowly closed his book and put on the table. "Oh, that's how you feel.", he quietly said, looking straight into her eyes. Although he didn't pull any particular face, she hadn't seen him so angry and sad ever before. "You should have told me before, then.", he added, his voice sounding so different to his usual, loving voice.

Rin swallowed, still feeling her blood boiling because of her blind anger. "Yes, Shirou, this is why I tell you _now_ to go to hell and leave me alone. Sounds like a great deal to me."

"Oh, so now I'm not even allowed to love you anymore?", he said and raised his eyebrows.

Tohsaka slammed her hands on the table and she was barely able to hold her anger and frustration in, anymore. Standing in front of the table she said with a colder tone and even harsher than she'd wanted to: "If that means that you're distracting me from the work that I have to do, yes."

She took her notes and went towards the end of their shared room, to have some personal space. But that didn't stop Shirou to stand up and confront her - he took her notes out of her hand, let them fall down on the floor and pushed her against the wall.

"Shirou, for Christ's sake, let me go!", she protested, standing in stock out of surprise.

"Hell, no." he, responded, trapping her between the wall and his body.

"I got better things to do than to argue with you, idiot", she whispered and tried to escape him, when he took her arms up over her body and held her down forcefully.

He didn't do that to her before, did he? As his body was radiating so much warmth, as his skin felt so hot against her cold wrists, she felt her inner crave for his love, his body again. Things were turning sexually interesting in her opinion. If he hadn't had this thing with Luvia going on...

"Oh, so you got better things to than to talk to me? Better things to do than to show me a little love? Because I'm feeling like shit because of the way you treated me the last week! Do you have any idea how I feel, right now?" Shirous expression was, finally, turning angry as well, and she started to understand his frustration little. Still, she had no intention to giving in to him - he was the one who didn't put Luvia into the place she deserved.

"I need to revise everything again for tomorrow."

"For an oral exam you'll pass anyway, because you're Rin Tohsaka and pass every exam concerned with magic with one snap? I don't know if you understand this, but I had to study very hard to pass my exams. What about you? For you, everything concerned with magic is as easy as primary school maths for a high-school-pupil. Don't get me wrong - I'm not jealous. I'm just wondering why you're absolutely overreacting because of this exam. And you won't even talk to me about it. Instead, you just shut yourself in."

The last part just hit her hard - that was when she couldn't shut her mouth anymore and decided to speak up.

"What else shall I do, huh? When you're out with Luvia every evening since you're free from mandatory classes? When you're doing every goddamn assignment in this damn class together with her? When you're not even man enough to tell her for real that we're a deal. That I'm your girlfriend. That you're not having anything with her, because you love me. But obviously, you're still going the polite way. You're still having her flirt with you. Because, obviously, you seem to enjoy her attention."

There was a short silence between them. She said in a lower volume than before: "I've told you so many times how she works. And still. You didn't listen to me."

"Because you're overly jealous, Tohsaka! And jeez, I told you, I'm doing those classes so I can finally get better for you!", Shirou answered, and she could see from his face that he didn't understand anything that was going on in her.

"No, _I AM NOT overly jealous._ ", she yelled, still trying to free herself, still failing. "Just let me go, now."

"No, I am not.", he replied, mimicking her.

"Jeez, you're exactly like Archer.", she hissed. Rin was winding around now, putting all of her strength into her tries to escape. "Both of you idiots should have listened to me!"

"Don't you dare to compare me with him.", he said dissatisfied.

"Why? It's only true. Now shut up and let me go.", she just said, her expression clear, and cold.

She didn't know what to say anymore. Because everything he said was true.

Yes, she should trust him. She should have faith that Shirou wouldn't just leave her for Luvia, although she was shamelessly hitting on him. On the other hand, sure he could have told her in a more earnest way thay he and Rin were in a relationship. Yet he was trying his best to be both polite and honest. But, anyway, this was not the time to discuss this.

"Hell, no.", he whispered. "If you want me to shut up, _make me_. Like hell I'll stop now. This is the first time that I ever ask for something, that I ever dare to critize you, and you're telling me to shut up whilst comparing me to that bloody man? Forget it."

Rin finally lost her patience.

As erotic Shirou just might have been, holding her hostage and finally speaking for himself and his thoughts, she still had better things to do. And stuff on her mind that wouldn't let her want to have sex now.

" _Fuck you_ , just go to Luvia and see her, if you're not satisfied with me.", she just said, trying to free herself one last time, but Shirou didn't let her. Instead, he suddenly came closer and started kissing her violently.

 _What the..._ , Rin just thought. Her line of thought broke off, because her mind was fogging up. Now that he was kissing her, leaving no centimetre between the wall and him, she was still trying to free herself - she knew she couldn't help it, he was stronger than her. The way he held her wasn't playing into her plans of freeing herself as well.

The black haired girl knew exactly that she didn't want to kiss him now, she felt that in her stomach. Yes, Rin felt very unforgiving. Very, very unforgiving. But the longer he kept on kissing her passionately, the more she started to enjoy the turn of the events. The fact that they didn't had sex for the past week played into her growing arousement as well. A jolt was running through her entire body, leaving her utterly defenseless against the auburn haired man's intentions.

"Screw it...", she whispered.

After an elaborate battle of their tongues, Rin tried to push Shirou to the side, as she wanted to take the lead, as she usually did. But this time, Shirou held her down with his physical strength. "Shirou", she moaned into one of the kisses, who already put his knee between her legs, letting her sensation grow immensly. His grip around her wrists grew stronger. " _What makes you think you'd top, today?_ ", he said with an angry undertone.

She felt her heart beating out of her chest.

 _What did he just say...?_

[...]

His face was buried in her shoulder, in her hair, his body laying on hers. And she just processed everything that happened, with a strong feeling of pure satisfaction in her whole body, and guilt in her stomach. Both of them stayed like this for a couple of minutes, before Shirou was moving. Their eyes met.

He was watching her closely, when his expression grew sadder, hands still next to her head to support his weight on the table. That's when she slowly realised what she truly did to him. What she truly said to him. How much she must have hurt him.

Finally, her pride broke away. Finally, she remembered that their love was more important than her stupid pride.

As her sensation slowly melted away, Rin moved her upper body in a upwards motion, causing Shirou to stand straight. Still heaving a seat on the table, she took his hand and pulled him closer again to hug him tightly.

Shyly, he returned her hug, sighing.

"I'm sorry, Shirou", she finally spoke against his chest, the pain hearable in her voice, her heart almost breaking from guilt. "I didn't want to hurt you."

She was looking up at his face, tears in her eyes. "How can I say such things to you, when I love you?" Their eyes met, and after realising what she said, he smiled again, finally.

Being still embraced by her hug, he spoke up. "It's okay, Rin. I am sorry for speaking up in a time like this. You're having your exam tomorrow, and I...", he stopped.

She looked up to him, his wonderful eyes filled with regret. "I was glad that you spoke up", she mumbled in annoyance, looking down again. "I was proud of you, to be honest."

A loud sigh left her. She was staring at his chest for a while before she spoke again. "You've grown so much, Shirou. And yet, I'm still messing up the most important thing." Again, she was looking up to him, her tears were now escaping her eyes.

And, as always, Shirou started to panick when her saw her crying. He embraced her in the warmest hug he could give her, pulled her naked body as close to him as he could, letting her head rest on his shoulder. "N-no, you don't! You'll rock the exam tomorrow."

She hit his back with her fists. "I'm talking about us, you idiot.", she whispered. "I can live with failing this exam, but..." - the words got stuck in her throat. She still felt odd when she was about to tell him things like that. She still felt that this wasn't something to say.

"I couldn't live with losing you either, Rin.", he said, knowing, smiling. "And, as I'm the most important thing, you'll handle this exam with ease. Remember? You said you can handle the rest, except for the most important thing."

Finally, she was laughing. "I can't BELIEVE you actually kept this in mind."

"Hey. This was a very important evening for me, you know. On the other side..." He lifted her up from the table, both of them still facing each other, and carried her. "You won't get me away from you. Never. Even if you're angry about Luvia - and I promise you, I'll talk to her as soon as I see her again. I'm going to tell her about my dearly beloved, beautiful, intelligent, and yet jealous and sometimes overly furious but still breath-taking girlfriend Rin Tohsaka." She chuckled. "And even if you're not happy with what I said, I'll stay with you. Even if you want to push me away, I'm going to be by your side." He rested, standing in front of their bed. "But now, that I know that you're just nervous about losing me, and not _not loving_ me anymore which is what I truly feared, I can finally put you to bed without having my heart broken. And no. You don't need to revise anymore."

He almost threw her into their bed. And she chuckled again. When he was lying down, putting the covers over them, she crawled up.

"Shirou."

He knew that he had to hold her as close as he could this night. And she knew he wouldn't oblige. So she felt those wonderful arms around her, holding her safe and sound.

"I love only you, Rin Tohsaka", he whispered into her hair. "As I said, I always have. And I always will." He was pulling up her chin like he did before their first kiss. And now, he was lovingly kissing her again. That was exactly what she needed after an argument like the one they had. "I love you too, you idiot."

"You'll never change, will you?", he just said, pulling her head close to his shoulder, hugging her tighter.

After a moment of silence, the girl spoke up. "Shirou." His answer was just like a hum.

As she felt his incredible warmth and his love, his pats on her head, his small kisses on her forehead, she finally found the courage to speak up what she thought, drawing little circles on his chest.

"W-We might have to re-enact this night at some point. I-I liked the change."

The man holding her just nodded affirmingly, with a smile on his face.


End file.
